Your memories will never leave you and there will be days that you will say; “If he knew what I was doing, he would be upset” or “If she could see me now, she would be laughing till she cried.” Let the memories flow to give you courage to move forward.
• A lot of traditions are no longer possible when a loved one dies. Keep what traditions you can and be willing to start some new ones. Example – Lighting a memory candle on Christmas Eve.
• Making a memory book with your child will help them to work through their grief. It helps them to understand that their loved one will always be with them in their memories.
• Help children talk about the good times they had with their loved one. Involving children is one of the most important things we can do for both them and ourselves.
• Write your memoir. Putting your memories on paper will ensure that they are there for the next generation. Writing will allow the details of the past to be recorded for all time and give your unique life a voice.
• I believe that when someone dies they are internalized in the people who are left behind. Our memories will keep them close to our hearts.
• Memory Quilt – One of the ladies brought a quilt to our monthly meeting that she had made out of her late husband’s T-Shirts. It was beautiful and each square was a T-Shirt that he had worn. It gave her comfort and kept her memories alive.
• Planting a tree is just one of many suggestions. This type of memorial can mean a lot to you and family members when dealing with a recent loss by watching it grow and remain strong for many years to come and it also gives back to the environment. Planting a tree memorial could involve all family members and become a gathering place or a private area to relax and remember lost ones.
I was paying my respect at the Funeral Home tonight for a much beloved man. The place was packed with people who came to share their memories and love for this man. In the end we will all die, but will we all have lived? Could it be as simple as surrounding yourself with people you care about and who care about you?
To Our Shared Journey,
Mary Francis, Author of “The Sisterhood Of Widows”